Hey Friend

As high-performing leaders, it’s easy to get overly-connected to our roles. We become the job title, own the workload, and carry the expectations of the position as if they’re written into our DNA. But here’s a useful reframe:

You are the custodian of your role, not the embodiment of it. You fill it, deliver it, and move it forward - but you don’t have to become it.

This distinction matters, especially in fast-moving, ever-changing environments where goals shift, priorities pivot, and yesterday’s focus is tomorrow’s discard pile.

When you’re overly attached to your role - when your identity is entangled with your title - it becomes much harder to let go, adapt, or say no.

You start pushing harder, taking on more, feeling increasingly exhausted…and heading straight toward burnout.

Letting go doesn’t mean disengaging. It means acknowledging the difference between who you are and what the role requires right now. It gives you clarity to ask:

• What’s expected of the role?

• What’s expected of me?

• And where are the two out of alignment?

When you see your role as a vehicle, not a definition, you can start leading with more intention and less emotional reactivity. You gain the ability to pivot without spiralling, to have difficult conversations about expectations, and to make conscious decisions about whether the direction of your role still aligns with your values, goals, and leadership style.

This perspective also helps you coach your team more effectively. When your people are struggling, ask:

• Are they over-identifying with their role?

• Are they clinging too tightly to something that’s shifting? 

Sometimes, the greatest gift we can give is permission to let go, without losing purpose.

Leadership isn’t about control. It’s about clarity. And when expectations are clear, accountability follows naturally.

✨ If you’re feeling the weight of your role, if you’re stuck in a cycle of pushing without progress - it might be time to step back, reset, and realign.

Through coaching, training, and facilitation, I help leaders like you reconnect with who you are outside the role - so you can lead with strength, clarity, and balance within it.

👉 Let’s talk: https://www.shelleyflett.com/pages/leadership-executive-coaching

With strength and kindness,

Shelley 😁

Shelley Flett

Leadership Trainer, Facilitator & Coach | Shelley Flett Pty Ltd 

M: 0407 522 888 | E: shelley@shelleyflett.com | W: shelleyflett.com

Calendar: https://calendly.com/shelley_flett/leadership-development-discussion

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