I watch people change.
That’s the gift of this work I do.
Sometimes people ask me, “How do you sit and listen to people’s problems all day? Doesn’t it exhaust you and bring you down?”
I tell them, “You don’t understand. I’m really lucky.
I get to sit and listen to people’s HOPE all day long.
They come to me because they have hope that things can change.”
I mean, by the time you go to a therapist or join a group to learn practical ways to love yourself and find your unique Truth, maybe you are feeling quite desperate to change.
But you join precisely because you hope that change IS possible.
When people tell me their story, I hear their hope shining through.
“This is what I’d like to change. Can you help me do that?”
And of course my answer is yes, because if they believe it can be different...
Then it’s true.
But what I also notice (in myself as well as others)...
Is we are extremely impatient about exactly how and how soon things should change.
And this is what we don't realise.
When we are impatient, we create resistance because we aren’t giving credit to what is already changing.
We only focus on what we believe hasn’t happened yet.
And we trip ourselves up like this as we gnash our teeth, stress, complain, feel hopeless and despondent, and wail…
"WHY hasn't this changed yet??"
Because that’s a full time job.
Who’s also got time to change when you’ve got all that going on?
So please remember this:
Impatience slows your desired changes down enormously.
Also, it’s really not self-loving
What works better?
Ask yourself, “If I loved myself, how would I choose to do this now?”
Say encouraging things to yourself about the efforts you are making to change the thing you wish was different.
Love and accept yourself right now, even before it changes.
Remind yourself that change which happens slowly is more lasting.
Be patient, be patient, be patient.
With yourself, with your body, with those around you.
We are all doing our best – even if our best sucks.
Everyone is trying.
Be kind.
I can tell you from almost thirty years of working with people who want to change...
the most efficient, productive, powerful thing you can do to effect the changes you want is to be kind and patient with yourself and life as you take the actions you need to take.
That’s it.
'Getting Stuff Done – the Self-Loving Way' is our theme this month in my community The Portal of Permission
If you’ve got…
emails or tasks you keep putting off
paperwork or bills sitting in a pile
a cluttered space you’ve been meaning to sort out
something half-finished that drains your energy just by existing
…come and join us.
Together we’ll be taking small, kind steps to face and complete the things that have been weighing on us - without pressure and without abandoning ourselves in the process.
It's revolutionary!
You can join us HERE
