Subject: Filthy Animals: Can I Get Soap!??
When can you get Filthy Animal Bars????
At Filthy Animal Soap Company, we pride ourselves
on the making of soap, over the selling of it...
Any jacka$$ can sell soap.
But it takes a real filthy animal to have the patience
and know-how to make soap the old-fashioned way..
Our soap-making- process uses a chemical reaction known
as saponification - not the useless melt-and-pour or
glycerine soaps.
Saponification involves combining fat with a mixture of
sodium hydroxide and water (lye). The reaction is much
like roasting marshmallows.
Once added, the lye slowly roasts the edge of the fat molecules. We use
organic, fair-trade fats from olive oil, shea butter, tallow, palm and
castor oil.
With an unquenchable thirst for more atoms, the fats latch on to sodium.
This sets off a chemical cascade that sends atoms and heat flying in a
thick soup. The end result an infernal bubbling mixture we call "trace."
This is when we selectively add essential oils of lavender, patchouli, bay
rum, cedar wood or even rose oil, depending on what bar we're making.
At trace, our useless fats are being fully roasted and alchemy is taking
over. They are improbably transformed into a product that nourishes and
protects even the most sensitive skin. But most importantly, this age-old
alchemy produces a weapon of mass destruction that shields us from
pathogens like ring worm, impetigo and staph.
It's slow.
It's tedious.
And sometimes it fails halfway through...but our evolution and longevity
are fully dependent on this wildly valuable soaping process.
Thus, Filthy Animal Soap is the ultimate protection for athletes. And it
shows that if you try harder than everyone around you, great things can
come from absolutely nothing.
And that has successfully caused sales to skyrocket...therefore, we won't
have soap until early October! And those will be our LIMITED EDITION
Wonder Woman Bars!
Our Limited Edition Wonder Woman Bars are made from olive oil, shea butter, tallow
and palm kernal, scented with essential oils of lavender and ylang ylang. Once brought
to heavy trace, we added black sea salt to offer exfoliation.
Stay tuned for their release in 4-6 weeks!
- A Filthy Animal
At Filthy Animal Soap Company, we pride ourselves
on the making of soap, over the selling of it...
Any jacka$$ can sell soap.
But it takes a real filthy animal to have the patience
and know-how to make soap the old-fashioned way..
Our soap-making- process uses a chemical reaction known
as saponification - not the useless melt-and-pour or
glycerine soaps.
Saponification involves combining fat with a mixture of
sodium hydroxide and water (lye). The reaction is much
like roasting marshmallows.
Once added, the lye slowly roasts the edge of the fat molecules. We use
organic, fair-trade fats from olive oil, shea butter, tallow, palm and
castor oil.
With an unquenchable thirst for more atoms, the fats latch on to sodium.
This sets off a chemical cascade that sends atoms and heat flying in a
thick soup. The end result an infernal bubbling mixture we call "trace."
This is when we selectively add essential oils of lavender, patchouli, bay
rum, cedar wood or even rose oil, depending on what bar we're making.
At trace, our useless fats are being fully roasted and alchemy is taking
over. They are improbably transformed into a product that nourishes and
protects even the most sensitive skin. But most importantly, this age-old
alchemy produces a weapon of mass destruction that shields us from
pathogens like ring worm, impetigo and staph.
It's slow.
It's tedious.
And sometimes it fails halfway through...but our evolution and longevity
are fully dependent on this wildly valuable soaping process.
Thus, Filthy Animal Soap is the ultimate protection for athletes. And it
shows that if you try harder than everyone around you, great things can
come from absolutely nothing.
And that has successfully caused sales to skyrocket...therefore, we won't
have soap until early October! And those will be our LIMITED EDITION
Wonder Woman Bars!
Our Limited Edition Wonder Woman Bars are made from olive oil, shea butter, tallow
and palm kernal, scented with essential oils of lavender and ylang ylang. Once brought
to heavy trace, we added black sea salt to offer exfoliation.
Stay tuned for their release in 4-6 weeks!
- A Filthy Animal