The prerequisite to receiving God's comfort, is that we mourn. It isn’t wrong to grieve and acknowledge the pain of our losses. Yet we don't mourn "like the rest of men, who have no hope" (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Our mourning is different because of our hope in Jesus who has overcome the power of death. He is also our High Priest who has shared our humanity and is able to sympathize with us (Hebrews 4:15). At Lazarus’ grave Jesus entered into pain of the mourners and wept. He showed us that tears and grief are a normal part of coming to terms with our losses. Even if we experience smaller losses, we still need to admit the pain of loss and disappointment. The "stiff-upper-lip mentality" isn't God's idea.

Once we have acknowledged our pain, we are then free to let it go. I once heard a worship leader comment, "Let the hurts of a lifetime flow into his nail-scarred hands." However, it may take some time to process, there is no instant pain-killer for major losses.

Being a Christian doesn't guarantee a life without tragedy, rather it means having access to God's resources. We always have hope regardless of the situation because God is Sovereign and he promises us his comfort when we mourn. However, if we don't admit our pain, we can't receive God's comfort. It may be humbling to come to his "throne of grace … to receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need" (Hebrews 4:16), but so worthwhile.

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