"You're a partner now. Figure it out."
That's what a valued mentor said to me a couple of months after I was promoted (felt like a gut punch).
When I made partner, I expected that things would change.
But the thing I didn’t expect?
That response. Especially since it was about one of his clients on an issue that only he had expertise in.
It shouldn't have been a complete shock. It had felt like he'd been pulling away for months…
No longer sending me work.
Not inviting me to client lunches.
Brushing off my ideas (even in front of other partners).
Yet I'd been telling myself that it was because he was stressed. It wasn't about me.
But clearly, it was about me.
Why share this, Friend?
I've since learned that souring relationships with mentors is common after promotions. Especially in law firms.
And no one ever talks about it.
So, when it happens, you're totally unprepared and worry you've done something wrong. Worse, you feel alone (so, so alone). And even feel shame.
What you should know is that, should this happen, you've done nothing wrong, there's nothing to feel ashamed of, and you do not have to feel (or be) alone.
But you do need to know what to do when this happens, which is why I'm talking about that today on Life & Law.
Go here for a deep-dive into recognizing the signs this might be happening to you and how to navigate it (without hurting your reputation).
And a quick note about what’s going on with your mentor…
