APOTHEOSIS

By leading Luciferian & bestselling author Michael W. Ford

With A Special Foreword by E.A. Koetting    May 7

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E.A. KOETTING   Hey everybody. This is E.A. Koetting, and I'm joined today by someone who has, for me, been an inspiration and a bit of an idol. This is Michael W. Ford. Thanks for coming on, man.

Michael W. Ford   Thank you.

E.A.K.   I'll tell you what. The power of magick is, to me today, very, very real in that this kind of conversation, this kind of communication, this kind of partnership is something that I've literally performed rituals for, that I've literally called out to the universe to bring this together.

That at some point ... it was like a boyhood dream ... I can maybe work with Michael W. Ford. And the fact that we're here together, that is a testament to me of the reality of this. And I know that you've seen your share of miracles as well, and can testify to the fact that this is all very real.

M.W.F.   Yes.

E.A.K.   Let me ask you, even just going way back into the beginning for you, what is it that originally stimulated you on this path? What was the seed that got planted that put black magick in your brain?

M.W.F.   Well, it began, from my earliest memories, when I was a child. Not practicing black magick, but I felt attuned to the imagery and the description of the Devil, demons. My mother was Christian, religious. My grandmother was very, extremely religious, so it was Bible down my throat pretty early on.

My mom wasn't very strict about it. My grandma, talking to her, it would be all about whatever, but I gravitated towards the adversary. And I recognized strength in that symbol, the ability to use intelligence, things like that. But living at my father's at an early age on a farm, he was a very, very, how do I say, physically violent man, and he comes from a different time.

So I was dealing with that, but then I would go off in the woods by myself, and that gave me strength. I felt something with me, driving within me, I didn't know what it was. And growing up, I then moved to Miami, Florida. Went to a school called Cushman, and prior to that, with my mother, we were always very, very poor. And so, when we moved and I lived with my uncle, he was the exact opposite. He worked for a Hungarian Count, so I experienced a whole different side of life, going to a private school for two years, and really learning different ways of thinking and living.

Then I went back to Indiana. At that point, I had really grown interested in the concept of Satan. And when I first started understanding what magick was, it was that it came from something else. But as I started delving into it, learning more and more about it, I did some things at one of my aunts' homes with my mother there. She had an old Ouija board, and I was wanting her to use it. And she would tell me, "Oh, we don't mess with that." Well, why do you have it? I was like, "Come on." So we were doing it, and it was answering the normal stupid questions, and nothing exciting at all.

And then, downstairs, the door opened and closed. And it's locked from the inside, so she thought it was her husband coming home, 11:30 at night. He worked for Conrail Railroad up in Indianapolis. And we heard the cat, her cat, growling with its ears back at the door. And we look around and there's nothing there. The cat's still growling, but that door had opened and closed, and nobody had come home. And so it freaked her out, and my mother, and I was just invigorated, so I kept doing the Ouija board by myself, until they caught me and then threw it away.

But a lot of those things brought a drive to me. Like, I felt connected with it, not in a good and evil sense, as if I want to do evil in the world, or Christian moral concepts like that. It was a spirit of strength, and when I first started actually practicing magick, I had got ahold of the Necronomicon, which of course is not a valid work. But I discovered something in that. We were performing a ritual upstairs in the middle of the night, my friend and I. And we, all of a sudden, started hearing pounding on the wall.

Now, when you hear that, you think, "Who else is up?" No one else was up, because he had this room in the attic, and it was all ... he had his bedroom and everything. So, when that happened, and we had a couple other experiences, it made me realize later on that the invocation, the power of belief, will, and desire in whatever you're doing, that was more or less the conduit...

E.A.K.   Let me jump in there real quick. Oh man, you just touched on so many awesome things, because, well first off, and this may be different for the current generation, but it seems like for our generation, the Ouija board was the route into this. That you play with it, and you have ... It's almost like the first bifurcation, where you have most people that say, "Oh, this is scary and evil," and they turn away from it. And then you have those of us that are not that way that dive head first, that it opens up to us. So I guess the first question I've got is, do you feel like you were actually communicating with disembodied spirits on that Ouija board?

M.W.F.   I think that there was a connection. I don't know if it was communicating through the board, because it's very hard to validate anything they say on a board. We were asking it questions like, "How many cars are in the parking lot right now," or in the cul de sac. And it answered, and after all of this happened, we went out and looked. Yeah, they were like that, but the experience of the door opening and closing, and the cat sensing the presence tells me that it drew something, and I think it was probably a spirit, a ghost perhaps.

Other people might ... My aunt later said it was probably a demon, which that invigorated me more, because I was just discovering metal music at the time, and Slayer. That's what attracted me to that. So yeah, I think the Ouija board can be a conduit for certain types of spiritual or metaphysical energies, and I think it had an intelligence, or it wouldn't open the door and close it.

ABADDON: Angel of the Abyss

Featuring E.A. Koetting, Michael W. Ford & Six More Authors

Compendium 4    The Nine Demonic Gatekeepers    May 28

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E.A.K.   Something interesting about that, that I've noticed, just after doing millions of rituals, is that there seems to be ... It's almost like, when you're performing the ritual, there's a whirlwind of energy that goes on around you, and it's actually on the outside of the event horizon of that whirlwind that you have a lot of interesting things happen. Doors opening and closing, voices whispering or even sometimes shouting, the pounding on the walls. That's always a strange one, because it's so physical, that you go answer the door to see who's knocking on the door, and nobody's there.

M.W.F.   Yes.

E.A.K.   Ah man, that's a cool way to immerse yourself. The other thing that you brought up was, once again, I think this is probably unique for our generation is the Necronomicon. That that was, for some reason, that was one of the most successful grimoires that you came across. I think it was Avon Books that put it out, and it was a paperback.

M.W.F.   It was at a time just before internet. The library had outdated books, and always it was like the bargain bin of occult books, so nothing was useful. The new age store that I went to, you go in there and they have a couple Crowley books, but as I'm looking at the Crowley books, it's the ones that don't really define magick. It's more ... because he can be very ... If you don't know what to look for, it's very hard to understand what he's trying to do.

And so I'm looking at Diary of a Drug Fiend, because that's what they had, and I'm like, "How does this have to do with invocation, sorcery, and all this?" And then, of course, I have the person who works at the book store tell me, "You shouldn't get into Crowley. You should look at Buckland's Book of Witchcraft." And I looked at it, and I'm like, "This isn't summoning what I want. I don't feel connected to this." So it was at a time, man, when you had to go with what you had, and that's what I knew.

It wasn't 'til later when I started my studies, I'm like, "Oh. Well, they used a basic frame of mythology and put it in a more or less a chaos magick type setting," which is fine. But yeah, that was a very interesting one. I was doing the ... We used to do the workings from The Book of the Worm, which came out of all of those, so yeah, that was my gateway drug.

E.A.K.   Yeah, no. That's ... One of the things you said about the Necronomicon was that you said it's not really a valid work, but nevertheless, it still worked. That's the amazing thing.

M.W.F.   Yep.

E.A.K.   And it actually seemed to work really well. I mean, really well, for being ... Well, you said it's a framework with egregoric sigils, basically.

M.W.F.   Yeah.

E.A.K.   Create these sigils, and create these ... you know the 50 names of Marduk. Those are, you'll be hard pressed to find many of those in the Enuma Elish or any of the traditional manuscripts, so.

M.W.F.   Yeah. And you know, with that said, it was a very important work, looking back. I still have the, I think it's either first or second copy that I had, because I think the first one I wore out. But I still, I love that and I love Lovecraft's stuff, and it has a certain resonance with me. But it also taught me a lot that, as I perceived this later, was that, man, I can ... If you have the right components, and you have will, desire, belief, which I've really connected to from the works of Kenneth Grant, Austin Osman Spare, and some of the Zösky occultist stuff, I went into later. That's really the main component that you need. At least to open those gates, if you will, towards initiation. So yeah, that's a very big thing.

Anton Lavey's Satanic Bible I discovered after that, because I couldn't find that in bookstores at that time, and that was a widely distributed title, but in Indianapolis, Indiana at that time, it was very hard. And if you asked for it, for them to order it in, you'd get the lecture, and this was at a time when everyone is Christian. And everyone is not a Satanist, especially pagans. Times have changed now, to where everyone's more accepting of certain things, but not then.

The Satanic Bible, when I read it, I felt that way. I felt very connected, and as I perceive it now, Anton Lavey laid down a foundation, and he took things that people were thinking and feeling, and through his research put it together in a very basic form. So it's a very important book, for its time, and I think it still resonates now, but it still didn't connect with what I wanted to connect with, and that took some time after. But it did give a proper understanding of how psychodrama works, and ...

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E.A.K.   When you say that, 'cause you said that a couple times now, that these different things, and even the Satanic Bible, didn't provide that connection you were looking for. Now the Satanic Bible is getting you into contact with at least a form of Prince of Darkness, or a manifestation of that, so if that wasn't enough, what were you looking for? Did you have an idea of what it was that was your goal?

M.W.F.   I wanted the spiritual ... I can only describe it as I wanted to connect with that spiritual power, which I felt when I was a kid that was with me. And at different times in your life, especially teenage years, you can feel very disconnected, and alone, in the sense that nobody really understands what you're trying to say.

And you know, I could never really talk to anyone about this, because my metal friends that I was starting to play in bands with, they were into the music, and the image, but they weren't into magick, so like I was the Satanic guy. And anything I talked to them about, they didn't get. Pagans at that time didn't get what I was saying, they would say, "It's all bad karma," and everything else. And especially my mother, she thought I was ... She told me at one point that my father, being the way he was, forced himself on her and I was born of the devil. So when I was told that, man I was so excited, because inside I knew, I knew that that's a good thing.

So yeah, what I was looking for was what I found later, was my daemon, or true will, and once I discovered Crowley's book four, and the Goetia, I started applying that. And I felt over time, it wasn't immediate, but I started to feel that connection. And I feel it as strong as ever today. So yeah, it took a long time to find that, and that's what I was hoping in my works, as they began, that I was providing, in a way, a gateway to maybe connect with people that were like me, and I didn't know a lot of those at that time.

E.A.K.   That's really cool, because you're basically searching for, you were on the hero's quest. You were searching for the impossible, really, and the journey brought you all the way back around to yourself, to look inside. Actually, you know, I'm so glad that you cleared that up, because that background there explains why in every single one of your books, the focus always circles back around to the magician.

And a lot of people, I think, misunderstand some of the things that you put out there, as far as you do say that you're connecting yourself in an extreme way. You're using these daemons and these ancient gods as deific masks, and you're putting them on and becoming that. And I think people misunderstand that as a statement that maybe this is all just a psychological play, or psychodrama, but it's not, because it does ... I think you will agree, that once you start stimulating that psychodrama, that a shift occurs where you actually do experience very real supernatural things.

M.W.F.   Yeah, you know to make this point, it's very important to understand that in my works, there's a very pointed emphasis on that you are the one that is opening those doors. The individual, the magician. You're not under the control of anything else, at least you have that choice. And the foundation you build at your temple of body, mind, and spirit, is essential in the beginnings, and often people stumble in the beginning, not knowing, "What do I do first?" Or, "Am I doing the right thing?" And they question that.

And that's what my works, at least in the first part of nearly every work, is the foundation of the individual. And you have to build that, and you have to enhance that, and sometimes you have to change aspects of yourself. And you're always gonna be imperfect and have issues and things that you wanna fix, that's life, but you have to prepare your mind, body, and spirit with the component of will, desire, belief, to make that possible, to then take the next step. So my works, and my approach, is not an atheistic one. It's not all psychodrama, but you have to understand the components that increase a psychodramatic experience that can become something else.

And also in my works, I'm not an atheist, however I have the responsibility, and I made this decision in the works, to present the Luciferian philosophy and aspects of Satanic philosophy, in a very cause and effect, rational way, that people can understand how, in applying these steps, then however you approach the demonic divine, is totally up to you. So I don't want to push my perception and my way of thinking on other people, because everybody's ... the way that they think and the way they approach things are different. They look at things differently.

So it should be adapted to the individual, and that's really kind of that whole focus. But yeah, a lot of people don't understand that you can explore both in this different way, and hopefully that changes over time.

E.A.K.   You know you make a point about challenging yourself, and changing yourself, and you and I both worked through a path working provided by the Order of Nine Angles, and within that system is a strong focus on insight roles, where you'll undertake a role that probably doesn't suit you, it's probably not what's in your natural desire to do, for a pacifist you might be driven to join the military, or to engage in martial arts. And you basically are finding almost a soccer team dialectic of what's the opposite, and pushing that to see really where you stand.

That's a very challenging thing, I don't know that most people can make it out of there sane, that's an intense thing.

M.W.F.   How I used one of my insight roles was, at the time, and when I was going through the Sinister Tradition, I had discovered that the system of pushing yourself and all of those things that I was trying to find, were right there, and in form. And in writing and corresponding with Christos Beest, for a good number of years in the 90s, I found that it was more adaptable than what people perceived.

And a lot of the extreme elements were there, but you can make it and forge it within your way. One of my insight roles, I needed to think about some way of making consistent ... a career. And at that time, music, playing music, especially underground, you don't make a lot. So I decided, I'm going to try for this certain menial job, and I'm gonna see about pushing myself through, and that required a lot of change. And at that time, I wasn't adept in any way of presenting things, or dealing with people that I didn't like. So that insight role, which lasted 10 years, was this learning how to apply what would become Luciferian philosophy, but the Satanic Principle, that was very cause and effect. And it required adapting yourself, and understanding how magick is applied in very, very often mundane and simple ways that you don't see the effect until over a period of time.

And that was the greatest role. Now, others might take different types of insight roles that could put them in peril. And you know, my desire, I never wanted to be in the prison system, it just wouldn't be something I like, so I avoided that. But definitely, I used the insight role in a kind of like, progressive way, and yeah, it was very difficult, but it taught me a lot.

E.A.K.   Well there's something to say about not being in prison, there are some virtues to be extolled with being free. And you know, I think there is a strong push in black magicians towards the adversarial, towards ... We have a curse upon us that we look at society, we look at the world, no matter how evolved its become, no matter how great it is, we can still see all the flaws. We can still see that it's just not perfect enough, and it's the adversarial force that pushes things forward.

So with that, it's easy to get into the anarchistic mindset of burning the world down, but you're able to do a lot more, you're able to effect a lot more change, if you're not in prison. If you're free, and not only free, but if you're prosperous, if you're healthy, if you're strong. If you've solidified yourself in this world, then you can really take domination over it. You can't dominate much of anything in a prison cell.

M.W.F.   I did a lot of correspondence, or requests for correspondence from prisoners all over the States, and it's very hard to get books to them. And you have to be on certain lists and so forth, but what the kind of insight that I've gained from what they say, is that they're instead internalizing their magical application. But the real, the one thing I learned with that insight role and what I call of Belial of Master of the Earth, it's your immediate world and your immediate impact upon it, and then the waves that come from that.

So I hate, and I say this strongly, I'm mostly, probably 80% a misanthrope, and I'm not ... I love animals, but I don't like people that much, and a lot of that is the ignorance that I see. Take for instance the concept of social justice. Elements of that are good, in that people should have, they should be judged on their merits and who they are as people, not by gender, race, or anything like that. That's a common thing. If you look back in the Greco-Roman period, or the Hellenistic Age, if you look between the lines, people were judged on what they did, on the name that they earned for themselves. And today, you see it in the media, in every news outlet and in social media, there's an agenda around the people that are providing it.

Specific news stations have their agenda, their narrative, and that is a form of what you'd call lower black magic, and they're trying to set their agenda. The political structure is very much, it's almost like you're entertaining monkeys. And I say that in that they use ... you can see their ways of manipulation, but people buy it. People believe it, and that, I think, is one of the things that I'm aware that I'm not a part of that. I understand propaganda and how useful that is, but we can change things by setting a standard within our lives for who are, and when no one's looking, we still live that way, and we still have those principles. Because one of the parts of true will, and being of the Left-Hand Path, is that you have, and you will build, strong inner ... I'd say moral, for a nonreligious terms ... a moral concept.

Things that you live by that you've discovered are good values for who you are. And often, if you look at the main society in Christians, or other monotheistic religions, they, because their doctrine tells them if you repent, you can get forgiven for nearly anything. So people can do all of the stupid things that they want, and all of the negative things, which are ... And I say negative, in that they're not adversarial, and they're certainly not Left-Hand Path. They can do petty things, and then ask for forgiveness and all is good. Well, Left-Hand Path, you're accountable to yourself, and if you start going against who you are, those values that you recognize enhance you, then that's something that it's hard to get over.

So you think before you act, and you apologize when you need to, and mean it. So yeah, as we can do more, simply by manifesting the adversary. And the adversary is about two things, is recognizing the paths to power, and then using this system to rise up through that, and how you wish. In doing that, then you're really expanding the adversarial spirit. The other is, what I call the more metaphysical aspects of using, utilizing, and enhancing your daemon, the black flame, to strive towards and astral reaching into the casual. And projecting that daemon into formulating your own place outside of time, within the ... beginning with the imagination, and creating that as a kind of like, a mnemonic system like the mind palace, or where you keep memories.

But it's not memories, it's you're projecting your being, that part of your daemon into. And that's a part of your greater black magic, something that's beyond the basics in Luciferianism.

Note: This concludes newsletter one of three in this series. You will receive part two soon.

Liberation. Apotheosis. Illumination.