Waiting and Questioning?
by Ben Thompson
Alpha, beta, gamma, delta…
I remember standing in the corridor outside my father’s office and hearing these strange ‘words’ emanate from the cassette-tape player before he would repeat them. I remember the agitation, the foot tapping, as I would wait for him to be done with his study.
…epsilon, zeta, eta, theta…
Standing in the corridor outside the sports hall, waiting for a physics exam, I would try and remember which letters went with particles and which went with waves in radiation theory.
…iota, kappa, lambda, mu…
I would sit in the library, writing these letters out repeatedly, committing their shapes, sounds, and order to memory, firm in the hope that this would make my Greek lessons run smoothly and support my theological training as I prepared to enter the world of Biblical criticism.
…nu, xi, omicron.
I find myself in a waiting season, once again punctuated by the Greek alphabet. I suspect that behind all the recent questions about pronunciation and reasons for skipping half the letters available lies unspoken questions. Will this variant be more infectious? Will the symptoms be severe than those brought about by previous mutations? Will our vaccines adequately protect us? Perhaps many have avoided these questions because we will only discover the answers through waiting, whilst we can find reassurance in the immediately available answers to technical questions. Waiting is rarely comfortable.
As part of my spiritual practice this advent, I am currently reading a collection of writings and sermons by the American priest and author Fleming Rutledge. In the book, simply called ‘Advent’, what comes across is the centrality of ‘waiting’ in Advent. For Rutledge this waiting is not a simply childlike countdown to a moment of Joy but is the calling to see our lives as part of the wider narrative of waiting for the coming of Christ at the end times. This involves immense discomfort, which she argues that for the Christian must include joining a tradition of asking tough questions: why is evil permitted? Where is God in this? ‘Oh Lord, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not listen?’ (Habakkuk 1:2).
As we continue this season of waiting (for Christmas, for clarity around Omicron), perhaps we should try to embrace these questions; questions that demand, hope, and maybe even believe, that one day we will experience life in all its fullness.
Ben Thompson is one of the ordinands from Ripon College Cuddesdon, currently on placement at St Mary's.
