Hello Friends,
December 25th is the day my husband, Shakil, and I decided to get married.
Eleven years ago.
My naivety convinced me that Christmas Day was the perfect day to tie the knot as we’d remember this day forever. I even wore a red and green lehenga to keep in tune with the theme.
With time we both realized how difficult it was to celebrate our anniversary on Xmas. Everything is closed and no one is available to babysit the kids.
This year, Shakil and I were able to have my parents babysit while we decided to spend the evening in NYC. After dropping the kids at their Grandparents, we drove to Manhattan. During the car ride, we talked about what we were proud of as a couple this year and what we’d like to try next year. The evening started with such a warm intimacy priming us for what was to come.
We found a parking spot and walked to the center of tourism, the middle of 42nd Street. After a few minutes of looking around, I asked Shakil to keep on moving, but he wanted to stay.
“But we don’t like crowds,” I said.
“Let’s be touristy for the day,” Shakil suggested.
With nothing to do but let my mind run wild, I said, “Wouldn’t it be cool if there’s a flash mob dance here?”
“What’s that?” Shakil asked.
This conversation was taking place in Urdu, so I bought into his question and defined a flash mob dance even when both of us have seen several flash mob dances on social media.
Shakil then asked me if we could take some pictures. We attempted to take some selfies until a kind man dressed in colorful clothing offered to take a picture of us. The man snapped a picture from Shakil’s phone and Bollywood music started to play. He quickly returned the phone to Shakil and ran back to join a group of his friends positioning themselves to dance.
In a daze, Shakil and I followed him getting a front-row view of the amazing flash mob dance! My wish had come true. Still, in a trance of disbelief and excitement, I saw women join the dance with red heart cutouts displaying pictures of Shakil and me. My heart started to beat faster at the realization that this dance was planned for me.
Thinking that it couldn’t get any better, Shakil joined the flash mob dance with the Professional Dancers! My husband of eleven years, who would think twice to join the dance floor, willingly danced in front of hundreds expressing his love for me in one of the busiest places in NYC. The woman standing next to me expected Shakil to propose. Little did she know…
At times I stared deeply into Shakil’s eyes as he was busting his moves; appreciating the thoughtfulness, the time it took for him to rehearse the moves, overcoming his fears of performance, and expanding his circle of allies to help him create this experience. A thought arose that my gift was not as special compared to the one he gave me.
Shakil ended the dance by taking my hand and twirling me into the circle of dancers. As we held each other in a warm embrace, it landed that my receiving of this gift was a gift to him. We co-created this moment of celebration together and those present happily joined in with cheers and applause.
Being a private person, I shared this moment with those I trust. I noticed my hesitation in sharing this more openly, which is a pattern. As the New Year approaches, I’m committing to leave the hesitation behind and celebrate life full out. I choose to fully immerse myself in the vulnerability and intimacy of celebration and I invite you to join me.
