The Layers of Life: Moving Beyond the Transactional Mind
In the interconnected web of human relationships, the transactional mind operates like a trap. It is a mindset where every action seeks reciprocation, every favor demands repayment, and every relationship hinges on gain. For those ensnared in this way of thinking, the world is a zero-sum game. But life, as Florence Scovel Shinn articulated in The Game of Life and How to Play It, operates on deeper, more intricate levels that defy such rigid quid pro quo mechanics.
Understanding this requires a shift—a movement from transactional thinking to authentic networking and purposeful living. This transformation is not only a personal evolution but also a collective one, with profound implications for the relationships we build, the lives we lead, and the futures we shape.
The Transactional Mind vs. Authentic Connection
The transactional mind breeds a hollow form of networking. In this space, relationships are treated like commodities, where value is measured in what can be extracted. This narrow perspective strips human connection of its richness, reducing encounters to mere exchanges.
Authentic networking, on the other hand, is grounded in sincerity. It is about forging relationships that thrive on shared growth, mutual respect, and genuine curiosity. The value here lies in learning, listening, and offering without expectation. As Jesus highlighted with the mission of the 72 others, true connection often carries an intrinsic purpose beyond individual gain—it is about collective advancement, service, and the greater good.
The Evolving Species: Levels, Layers, and Doors
Life operates on multiple levels, and understanding this multi-dimensionality requires patience and introspection. Each stage of growth unlocks new “rooms” with their own rules, challenges, and opportunities. As evolving beings, we are still piecing together what it means to live fully, to connect deeply, and to navigate the unknown.
This is not a solitary journey. It requires aligning with those who value and understand our contributions. As demonstrated by AfriKin’s decade-long growth, success stems from forging meaningful relationships that transcend the transactional. AfriKin’s mission to bridge Africa and its diaspora exemplifies this: it’s about building networks of mutual respect, trust, and shared purpose.
Breaking Free from the Transactional Mind
Breaking free from the transactional mindset starts with recognizing its limitations. Here are steps to foster a shift:
Introspection: Reflect on your motivations. Ask yourself why you engage in relationships or tasks. Are you driven by gain, or is there a deeper purpose?
Practice Generosity: Offer help, time, or knowledge without expecting anything in return. This mindset fosters genuine connections.
Listen Actively: Instead of focusing on what you can say or gain, truly listen to others. Listening opens doors to understanding and growth.
Surround Yourself with the Right People: Align with those who value what you bring and share your vision. Seek out relationships where mutual growth is the goal.
Validate and Test Ideas: Like ourjourney in the events industry, growth often requires testing ideas and refining them. Embrace failure as a stepping stone, not a setback.
Trust Your Intuition: As the old adage suggests, “never violate the hunch.” Intuition often points toward authentic paths.
The Value of Patience and Perspective
The game of life is not a sprint; it’s a marathon. By recognizing the layers of experience and the diversity of opportunities, we cultivate patience. This patience allows us to evolve, to learn, and to adapt to the intricate rules of new “rooms” we enter.
Florence Scovel Shinn’s insights remind us that life’s challenges are not obstacles but tools for growth. Through faith, listening, and deliberate action, we begin to master the art of the game. Information, as my journey has shown, is key. It is through data, observation, and introspection that we shape the paths forward.
From Optimism to Purpose
As an optimist, I believe that every interaction holds potential. Life may not always offer a clear return for every action, but the intrinsic value of sincerity, learning, and growth far outweighs transactional gain. When we move beyond the transactional mind, we open ourselves to a richer, fuller experience of life.
The work we do stands as a testament to this. It has been a journey of finding the right people, refining ideas, and fostering connections that resonate with purpose. The art of the deal, as much as it involves strategy, is ultimately about sincerity.
To truly thrive, we must embrace the layers of life, engage authentically, and play the game with grace and intention. By shedding the constraints of the transactional mind, we can step into a more meaningful, impactful existence—one that benefits not just ourselves, but the broader world we touch.
Lose the quid pro quo approach to life. Nike says just do it, but please do it from the goodness of your heart!
Love, in spite of ...
Alfonso Brooks
Founder, AfriKin
